[QUOTE=2ndwolf;n183131]
I doubt a game with a few thousand players could rake up that much money.
I get that too, that part where I have to start over because I didn’t consider some aspects of what I’m doing…
[/QUOTE]
It’s not so much the amount of money that was literally made, which is close to probably a hundred thousand; it’s also about the fact that the NPC Server made their technology possible. If I wasn’t 14, I would have patented the idea; but instead they pretended to be my friend to get stuff from me because they cannot conceive of breakthrough ideas. The NPC Server was an original idea; it’s moot, regardless.
It’s also the fact that I was an exploited child; that money that would have went to college & tuition, as well as launching a business would have transformed the past 15 years of my life. Also, the player base alone is enough for me to sell services & market myself; they took all of my following from me by hoarding my game as their own. Raking in an audience like that doesn’t come easy; it was rightfully mine, and Unixmad wants to keep all of the playerbase for himself. It’s not just about content–it’s about business, opportunity, and the security of customers; the networking, experience, and establishment of my own company. Instead, I was called a liar in front of my own customers, & banned from my own community to prevent any possible power being acquired to myself for asking Unixmad to give me the power that is mine. He publicly slandered me, 4 years after he took advantage of me as a kid.
These sorts of things do not only set a person back, but they traumatize them; like I said, 6 months ago is when I finally realized that I was living in denial about what happened. For 15 years he’s stabbed a dagger like a thorn in my side and ruined my life. For 15 years I should have had a community of my own, control of my content, hosting, lifetime royalties, and more. I jumpstarted his business. He took every single piece of possible power that would have made my life better and sucked the life out of me.
Like I said, the worst part is that way this trauma cripples a person; it gives them PTSD and makes it difficult for them to overcome it because anytime they try to move forward, all of these flashbacks of the abuse & robbery, manipulation, loss of their art & content especially from such a young age–and a long path of year after year of depression–just fills you with rage, stuns you, and paralyzes you from within from wanting to do anything. I shouldn’t have to, that’s how I feel; it’s difficult, like I said, to explain.
Not until 6 months ago did I stop calling myself a liar, an arrogant selfish idiot who got what he deserved (things I was called by Unixmad as a child). I don’t know how much longer till the PTSD goes away, if it ever will; I may never make another game again, although I went to school for it. It just brings up all these horrible feelings inside that rip my chest into pieces.
Imagine a man who goes to war; then imagine the PTSD he experiences around loud sirens, explosions, gunshots, and reminders of the war. Imagine a woman who has been raped and the anxiety she feels around anyone who looks like the man who raped her, or situations & conversations that remind her of it. Trauma is trauma.
I have been robbed of at least 15 years of success to a man who has done nothing other than jumpstart a business off what would have been my successful lifetime future. That is why he owes me more than $100,000 or $200,000–imo. It is my passion, not his. All of the original money from my bomy game went to Unixmad & Bomber to jumpstart their futures & have fun with it all–before which no one would buy Graal; I got dragged through the dirt, left alone dark & cold, kicked out, called names, and left crippled with feelings of injustice & denial as a “thank you” for “giving” them what they couldn’t do.
It’s hard to explain how it feels to watch these sick pieces of shit all over Facebook in photos with rich exotic locations when I haven’t been on a real vacation in years, and never really have; I’ve been stuck in my fucking capitalist hometown, unable to even use Graal as a real reference for anything, studying psychology & law to heal a mysterious wound I was in denial about, unable to make games because of a recurring anger I was in denial about, & forced to work work work more and more until I drop dead.
